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A Guide to Love, God, Prayer, Meditation, & Peace Within You—Right Now

Empty Nest – Finding Your New Life Purpose

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John: “I am a divorced male who has raised three children. As the last one goes off to college, I find myself very lonely as a single empty-nester. I find that I have nothing that I derive joy from in my life now and feel that I have nothing to wake up for in the morning. I am guilty of putting my children first in front of potential relationships in the past and now I find myself regretting it. How can I find a new purpose in life now that my children have gone off to college?”

The Voice for Love: “Dearest Precious One, how beautiful you are and how beautiful is your question. You are so treasured and so loved. Please know this. Thank you for your dedication and accomplishment in raising your three children and do not undervalue what you have done. Your children are so blessed to have you as their father and indeed they sought you out as souls and came to you expressly to be fathered by you. So do not miss the significance and value of your great gift of loving and parenting them.

“And now the page of your life is turning. One chapter has ended and another begins. We would invite you to see your ’empty nest’ as a place of spaciousness and opportunity. Stretch out in your empty nest as you would in a place of luxurious comfort and ease. Take your time, do not rush. This emptiness is not an emptiness in YOU, rather it is the openness and space given you now to fill with all that you are.

“There is great treasure within you, my dear one. As you step back from the role and definition of father, you are returning your focus to yourself after many years. And yet, those years of being focused on the care of your dear children are not lost years. Though you were not aware of it, you were increasing the treasure within, you were adding to its stores. Have no regrets about your choices, for they have enriched you. Now as you get to know yourself once again, you will find even more to appreciate.

“It is time to recreate your life, to get to know you once again. Yes, it is an overwhelming idea, a feeling of blankness, or even lostness at times. Do not be overwhelmed, my dear one, for you already have the skills you need. It is the same skill set you have used as a father, the same focus, attentiveness, perceptiveness, devotion and care. Now apply these skills to yourself. Whereas your first thoughts have for so long been toward what your children would need each day – their schedules, activities, tasks – now your first thoughts must be toward you.

“See your empty nest as a place of spaciousness. On awaking in the morning, see yourself stretching out in that space fully. Quietly go within and bless this space you have created for yourself. It is a great gift you have given to you; appreciate and relax into it. Sink into its comfort and ease. Now, in this wide open space, you can call yourself forth.

“As you stretch and luxuriate in this space, ask yourself: What do I need today? How do I feel? What would I like to do, explore, try? Then allow the answers to arise without judgment or censoring. Simply allow them to come to you. Very simple things, to very surprising things, may occur to you. Be open to all possibilities and honor them. Listen to yourself now, the way you have listened to your children. Tune into you in that same way and follow what you hear. This will be a process and you must trust each step along the way. You must give to yourself now no less than you have given your children.

“Have no regrets about the path your life has taken. It is not that you mistakenly or wrongly put others before yourself. All is in perfect order. Now is the specified time for your unfoldment. Your years of focusing on your children have prepared you and enriched you for this time. You are exactly where you need to be.

“Your task is to grow acquainted with you now, to love and honor you, to be to yourself who you have been to others. You are the greatest gift you can give yourself, and as you do so, you will become a gift to others as new relationships come into your awareness. Generate all the love you can, my dear one, and love must come to you because love is an irresistible force.

“You are in such a beautiful place now and we would encourage you to sink into it with gratitude and openness. Be at peace, Precious One, and know that you are never lost. You are greatly loved and divinely cared for in every moment.”

  • Steve

    I wish you would just write the article instead of having people pretend to channel a spirit. I have done spiritual direction for many years now and never have we ever gone into a trance and started talking like “dear one” ect. ect. The holy spirit speaks through each person through regular normal conversation, mostly when you aren’t aware of it. 

  •  You wrote in reply, “We would invite you to see your ‘empty nest’ as a place of spaciousness
    and opportunity. Stretch out in your empty nest as you would in a place
    of luxurious comfort and ease. Take your time, do not rush. This
    emptiness is not an emptiness in YOU, rather it is the openness and
    space given you now to fill with all that you are.” 

    This is a wonderful reply to John. I was feeling extremely sad today because our family is thinking about moving about 155 miles away from my father who is the last relative living here in town. He’s 85 and fairly spry but it would almost kill him (and myself) to see us go. I just don’t see how I could go and leave my father because I never want him to feel abandoned. That is kind of how I think that John above must feel, sort of abandoned as well.  But the advice Val gives on this entire page is very very helpful in both John’s situation and my own; to open the space welcoming-ly, slowly and love yourself and then others to enlarge your space. I am so grateful that I read this answer today. I can go in peace to whatever I attend to  today and I sure that John can as well.  Thanks Voice For Love!

  • Heart4thesouth

    thank you for this, I relate so very much to this sharing. I am widowed since 2009, and I have felt severely all the things John felt multiplied. thanks so much again, Mary

  • Austriajperez

    thank you val that is the message i need to hear right now i am in the same situation, my only daughter is going to college and last year my father path away and i took care of him, my mother have a heart attack the same day , and later my only brother get sick in my country, i have been taking care of everybody that i lost my self i don’t even know what i want for myself .thank you i  going to take the message that you send , i think is an answer for my holy spirit  through you and this channel thank you.

  • Magichristine

    Isn’t that something…There must be plenty of us who resinate with the “Empty Nest” I will take the advice and apply it to myself as I am in the same situation….
    There is a big wide world waiting out there

  • Faustinedargbe

    YOUR SITUATION IS NOT STRANGE,THERE ARE SO MANY WOMEN IN SIMILAR SITUATION,I KNOW IT IS WITH PRAYER AND YOUR CLOSENESS TO GOD THAT CAN MAKE YOU STAND WELL.THE YEARS YOU FOCUS ON YOUR KIDS WONT BE IN VAIN,GOD ALWAYS REWARDS SUCH SITUATION, I’M SPEAKING TO AS AN EXAMPLE. I BELIEVE IN DUE COURSE GOD WILL GIVE YOU A SPECIAL PARTNER TO HEAL YOUR LONELINESS. KEEP BEING CLOSE TO GOD HE HAS THE RIGHT SOLUTION.AMEN

  • Leninena

     enjoy your situation, continue giving love to all the people that surrounds you, then you will receive God’s answer, then you’ll never feel alone.

  • chony4

    Wow,wow and wow, What an amazing Father to have been present like that for his children’s growth in life….. This brings tears to my eyes knowing that there are men out there that can nurture and Love thier children with unconditional Love. Although now it is time to nuture yourself.
    Love & Blessing’s thank you for sharing…
    Mother Raising her 3 children on her own 🙂